Ellen DeGeneres

Hosted: once (2006)
She brought us the kinder, gentler Oscars. I’ll see your yawn and raise you a snore. DeGeneres admitted right off the bat in her monologue that she had been dreaming of hosting the Oscars since she was a little girl. Her whole approach was, I’m not one of you, but I’d love to be one of you. Who among us does not shudder when remembering that joke about pressing a script on Martin Scorsese?No one wants the host to be an autograph hunter, even if we know it’s just a routine. (We all know you know these people, Ellen. You’ve been in Los Angeles a long time.) For the stars it’s probably embarrassing. For us, the insecure half-smile is a little off-putting in this particular setting. There’s Ellen putting herself in our shoes, but would we be so gushy? No, and especially not on a night that calls for a little sophistication. We’re at home here drinking champagne or, at the very least, wine out of a bottle, not Tab and Coke. Also, the white shoes and red suit -- actually, for that matter, all of DeGeneres’ outfits -- brought Barry Manilow to mind. Troubling.
Overall impression: Too fan-girl to be fun.